Faith I Can’t Hold

From a Freshman design project about spiritual abuse and sexism.

I envy the type of faith and theology I used to uphold. It was so much easier. Black and white was far more comforting. I could write it down, list it out, define it and show it to you. Here, see? Chapter 3 verse 16.

Now, I hardly can keep up. I can’t get my hands around it, I can’t hold it. It spirals out of control, whizzes around, transforms into something even more elusive before I can find it again. But I can’t stop chasing it even though I know catching it isn’t an option and one I don’t even want. I revel in catching glimpses though, I glory dance. I get hungrier for more so I run faster, harder; I leap. I sometimes fall.

I always get back up.

Wanting more.

Needing more.

Knowledge, truth, understanding, love.

More God truth.

More world truth.

More me truth.

More purpose.

And I find it, in places I don’t expect, in people I don’t expect.

Not in steeples

Not in robes

Not behind pulpits.

So, I run, tumble, fall, dance and rest in this glory filled journey.


One thought on “Faith I Can’t Hold

  1. I remember watching you dance and the delight it gave me. I draw on those sweet memories often, they sustain me. Watching you and Whitney grow has been the joy of my life. I love you sweet Sydney. Xoxo MOM

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s